Monthly Archives: August 2015

Dads and future Dads, it’s time

 I’ve sat at my computer multiple times to try and write this, but every time I can’t finish this.  Honestly, there is so much that I want to say and so much that is currently being said so I struggle with where to even begin.  But something has shifted in my heart and it is without a shadow of a doubt because of this little bundle of snot, gumption, and chatter box: 

  Everyone, meet Hadley Jo.  She is my daughter.  She is the second greatest female on the entire planet and she thinks she’s the only one on the planet 90% of the time.  Hadley has an incredible ability to walk into a room and every single person not only notices, but adores her.  It’s mostly her crazy knot of a curly head and incredible blue eyes, but it gets you every time.  If you know her, you love her.  If you’ve seen pictures of her, you want to love her.  And Hadley’s presence alone has been a defining moment in my life.  There is no better job than daddy.  

So, this summer as I have been watching Hadley change I’ve also been watching the world she is going to be raised in change all around her.  With all of the change coming with presidential nominations, Supreme Court rulings, and the now surge of popularity in the topic of abortion and Planned Parenthood, all I can do is sit and look at all of this through the lens of “daddy” now. 

The last issue, the topic on abortion has dug a place deep in me.  I can’t shake it.  And it started months ago when the worst news of my life came.  

After having Hadley, Emmy and I decided to just blow the lid off and start having more babies, because we like to not sleep I guess.  God was so gracious and this past March, on a trip to Tahoe with friends Emmy shockingly told me we were pregnant again.  And boom! We are at it again.  We had so much joy and excitement!  And then it all vanished.  Weeks later Emmy woke up and had some physical issues with her body and we had lost the baby.  She miscarried.  The joy and excitement to watch another baby grow up under our care was stripped from our hands.  That life was precious and as that baby’s daddy the fact that I could not protect him or her ruined me.  After Gods extreme kindness through the healing process we came out the other side with a new sense of zeal and love for Hadley!  We weren’t promised children, but in our selfishness we assumed we were.  But we had Hadley, and man Hadley was special to us.

Hadley is special, but Hadley isn’t special. 

Hadley has a unique ability to birth joy in people that I can’t.  A unique gift to make women long to hold, kiss, and nurture her.  And an uncanny power to cripple men and make them talk gibberish, speak softly, cuddle often and care gently.  If everyone was honest, something in our affections are stirred when babies are near.  This isn’t just a Hadley ability, this is all babies.  Boy or girl, new born or toddler, something about the newness of life breeds a unique sense of Glory.  

And with babies breeds insecurity, fear, and failure.  When Glory is revealed, our nature and history reveals that instead of seeking glory we seek ourselves.  There in lies the problem with abortion, but it’s not just an abortion issue: this is a Gospel issue.  Romans 1 says it best, “they exchange the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal men.”  When glory is present, sin is highlighted. 

Remember, I’m looking at this through the lens of “dad”, so here is my question to all the daddy’s out there: where is your voice on this? Where are the men that have been called, commissioned and given the responsibility by God as protectors to stand for life.  Hadley in just a few years is going to be able to look at her daddy’s job, actions, hobbies, and where he spends his time to form an opinion about what kind of Daddy he is.  Is there anything I want my daughter to understand more than I love her? No.  But my love for Hadley started before I saw her baby blues and crazy hair.  My love for Hadley was deep in me before she ever gave me “daddy kisses”.  Hadley’s life started long before I saw her.  All of me knew that the second Emmy said “I’m pregnant”.  I want Hadley to see me love unborn children deeply, sacrificiallly and with a protecting love.  Because when she sees my actions she will believe that my love for her started long before I knew her too.

Men.  Dads.  College men.  Why are we standing back while our sisters, wives, and female friends lead out by standing for life?  We should be just as passionate about protecting the lives of babies, because they reveal glory.  What better example for our kids than for them to see their daddy’s sacrificiallly love babies we have never seen.  How much more will they see our love for them, our own children, when they see us love the unborn children? 

Not a dad yet? This does not mean you go quiet.  This is your fight.  Spend a couple minutes  thinking about babies that you know.  Nephews, family friends.  That baby breeds joy in your life.  That’s simply because that child was masterfully created in the glorious image of God himself.  They deserve to grow up seeing the men in their life fighting and standing for life.  

My hope and prayer is this, that it will not take more deparvity for the men in this country to lead even in the areas that we feel “uncomfortable”.  I am crazy thankful for the women that have faithfully for years been advocates and used their voice, platform and efforts to stand for life.  Thank you for carrying the banner for our babies that reveal and birth joy in a way nothing else in creation can.  Men, it’s our turn to follow suit – it’s time to stand, talk, read, study, and pray for life. 

So what do you do men?  There is so much and so many options but let’s start small: Some dear friends have launched a movement that is a great place to start: Stand For Life Movement. In the age of social media, takes two minutes and claim that you’re standing for life.  There’s a great graphic that you can post to your Instagram etc.  My hope is that we see men all over coming out and standing on the authority God has given them to stand for life.  

Next, if this stops here with a post, we are failing and showing our kids that going to the internet to state an opinion is enough.  Do not believe the lies that we cannot make a change: 

  • Educate yourself, read the stories that birth joy on Stand for life website. Let’s use life as our defense against death.  This is our weapon, the weapon of the Gospel.  Know the statistics, science and biology behind life. 
  • Share stories of redemption, birth, and adoption via all channels and platforms you have 
  • Stand on the authority of the Word of God, not your own authority.
  • Pray.  Pray specifically for the thousands of pregnancy centers offering aid!
  • Pray for salvation in this country.  
  • Go to your local church and ask questions about what your church is doing to support and aid the fight of standing for life.  If they aren’t doing anything, don’t leave but start something.  Every church should be doing something and you’re a part of that.
  • Pray for adoption agencies, support people wanting to adopt both relationally and FINANCIALLY.  
  • Last – married couples, instead of asking “should we adopt?” Ask, “is there any reason we shouldn’t adopt?”

As the people in this country see others standing for redemption and life, their hearts will crave it.  We must believe the Gospel promises are enough for all things!   We need more daddy’s and future daddy’s standing for those that can’t.  It’s what dads do, we stand for justice as God did to the point of death. Let our seeking for justice be coated and overwhelmed by a love for mercy. 

 Stand for life.  Stand knowing that God is sitting because His work is done!  Praise God for life and redemption.  

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